Basic Goodness

We human beings, like all the beings on this earth, are basically good. Why? Because there is nothing right or wrong about life; life just is.
According to Chogyam Trungpa, basic goodness is like a sneeze. "When you sneeze there is no time to think about good or bad. The sneeze just is. The simple capacity to have your own personal experience is basic goodness. It does not have to be compared to basic badness."

To access the felt experience of basic goodness we sit in meditation, and slowly, as we let go of thoughts in the mind and feelings in the body, the "just is" feeling arises. Realizing our basic goodness is an important step toward skillfully managing self-blame, and that will be the focus of our January Meditation Morning.

We are fundamentally good. Why? Because we are Life, and Life is fundamentally good

We just are.

How comforting.

No Agenda

We come to our Meditation Mornings to sit. At best we sit as if we were rocks, each of us with our own center of gravity. We have no other agenda except to be aware.

It's a strange thing to do, to sit. People "relax" "waste time" or "hang out" but most never - not once in a life time - do they sit with awareness.

Sitting is a powerful act, even a rebellious act since it is an alternative to the frantic busyness in our culture.

And it takes great courage. "Stuff" comes up, be it physical discomfort, the confused mind, or deep loneliness. Our egos rebel and we become antsy, irritated. Then our minds scream GET UP.

Even so, we sit. Our sangha friends support us; we couldn't do it without them. And the Dharma tells us that generations of other meditators have let go of the same demons.

Suchness

If you could choose, where would you be right now? In the relative world? That's where we spend most of our lives. This world takes a myriad of forms including galaxies, ants, and human beings. Birth and death are as basic as pleasure and pain. In meditation we observe the relative inside us in our internal talk, in body sensations that come with emotions, and in our internal imagery. Living in the relative is an incredible trip - and very far from easy.

With an ever-so-subtle shift in focus it's possible, once you know how, to sense the absolute. You might, for instance, be looking at waves rolling toward the shore when, in a flash, you see those waves as part of a larger whole, the ocean. Or you might be looking at a clear blue sky and suddenly sense the immensity of the universe. A peek into the absolute often comes with awe - and the realization that simply being alive is more than enough.

Bringing that realization back to your daily activities you merge the absolute with the relative. That's the world of suchness.

Knowing Peace

Sometimes we human beings get caught in negative thoughts and that causes us much unhappiness. You might hear yourself say, "I can't do anything right." Or, with great anger, "How can he be so selfish?" You might even hear, "Why doesn't she understand that I'm right and she is wrong."

When we listen to these negative thoughts in meditation we observe that they can come in bursts of anger and streams of frustration. We observe that they can be directed outward toward others or inward toward the self.

Caught in illusion, many people assume that this negativity is their problem. And they assume they have to get rid of it to feel happy. Negativity isn't a thing can be owned. Instead it's an activity that comes and goes.

Developing clear awareness, we experience angry thoughts arise, do their dance and fade away; we watch disappointments arise, do their dance and fade away. At some point we realize there isn't any need to add to these thoughts. In fact we don't need to do anything - except to listen matter-of-factly, with equanimity. And then we know peace.

Know Your Demons

We all have our demons. Let's imagine yours takes the form of an unhappy marriage. Buddhist psychology teaches that this demon lives inside you even though it appears to exist outside - in your partner.

To meet your unhappy-marriage demon sit in meditation and place your awareness on the part of the body where you have sensations that come with emotions. If you're not sure where that is, focus on the face, the neck, and the front of the torso. That's where these body sensations tend to arise, although not always.

Now bring an unhappy marital moment to mind. Perhaps you sense tightness in the neck and shoulders, and for you that indicates anger. Focus in again and you discover a feeling of heaviness in the whole body and a teary feeling around your eyes. It's clear that your demon is both angry and sad. Listen to your internal talk to hear what your demon is saying that is angry or sad.

One day you decide to offer the demon a cup of sweet tea and it works! Now the demon is less absorbing and you have the oomph to find other ways to live in your marriage.

An Ocean of Awareness

Most of us live in a very small pond of awareness because we're trapped in our internal talk - mostly in the stories we tell ourselves. These stories function like filters that limit what we see, hear, feel, taste, smell, and think. Often we're not even aware that the filters exist.

To expand into an ocean of awareness, we use one-pointed awareness. It actually dissolves the filters and exposes our six senses to life as it truly is. Aiming one-pointed awareness toward a black bird's whistle we hear a subtle inflection or the sound of silence.
I do not know which to prefer
The beauty of inflection
Or the beauty of innuendo

The black bird whistling
Or just after.
Wallace Stevens

Want to Study the Ego?

When all is quiet try setting aside 20 minutes to meditate on your internal talk. You can do this by placing your awareness somewhere between your two ears and the back of your head. Don’t make the talk happen, just listen. This puts you in the present, which is where you need to be to explore the ego.

Do you hear talk about the past? Is it a happy memory? Or are you caught in a re-run of an unhappy time. Try not to get lost in either. In this listening mode you are simply observing how the ego arises in internal talk.

You might, instead, be someone who enjoys fantasies. Maybe you’re imagining islands in the sun, or a lover who offers just what you need. This is another ploy to keep you so riveted that there’s no room for life outside the ego.

Perhaps you’re addicted to planning for the future. Do you make lots of lists? Do you rehearse the exact words of a future conversation? This is the ego’s craving for certainty. It denies you the openness of mind that is ready to receive the new.
Lastly, you might hear yourself repeatedly making judgments such as: “How could I have been so stupid,” or “He’s a fool”. Please know that the ego’s judgments can’t survive if you stop believing in them.

Looking In

There’s a belief in our culture that looking in makes people self-centered, disengaged and separate. Looking out is often considered more engaged and even healthier. The reality is almost a complete reversal.

Looking in, we observe how ideas – our story lines and judgments – actually do keep us self-absorbed. For instance, you might hear yourself frequently judging others, which separates you from them. Or you might hear yourself interpret a new experience so that it fits into an old story line. That separates you from what is.

However, with time, meditation, and great patience, you can experience moments when all ideas and judgments fade. In the silence that arises, you might realize that behind all your opinions and story lines is fear – and behind the fear are some very tender feelings. These are very big tender feelings since everyone has them.

Looking in deeply is to know that we are One

Who Am I?

If I ask who you are, you might say; “I’m a lawyer,” “I’m an extrovert,” or “I’m depressed.” But certainly you are more than any of these labels.

So you try again. “Well, I’m also simply me, a human being, a self.”

And so I ask you to show me where your self is. Can we find it in your brain? If you look inside you will see neurons that fire across synapses in a very complicated neurological system. Surely, that’s not you. Nor can you find it in your heart, your liver or spleen. These organs are all very important; they work together to make you happen. But none of them is you.

“Hmmm,” you say: “Perhaps I can find myself in my personality – in my own thoughts and feelings. That’s certainly me. I can’t imagine that anyone else has my particular thoughts and feelings.”

That’s true, I add, but if you watch closely, particularly in meditation, you will realize that your thoughts and feelings are ever changing. They are not any kind of solid or permanent thing. Anger, fear, gratitude, love, sadness, come in waves of experience. Tell me, where are you in all this?

“Ah,” you say, “I get it! I am not any one of these things. Instead I’m the activity! “I’m not a noun, I’m a verb.”