At some time during your meditative journey it’s very likely that you will hear yourself say: “Sitting is hard. My back aches, my mind won’t slow down, and I’m certainly not feeling relaxed. So why in the world am I spending my time meditating?”
This is a defining moment for a meditator because it offers the opportunity to commit to the path even with its difficulties. Sitting is a way to pare down life to the simple. With nothing to distract it’s more likely you will learn how your particular personality works. You may, for instance, hear your internal voice complain about the discomfort.
You may also become aware of certain body sensations, perhaps a tension in your muscles, which for you signifies anger. Continuing to sit, it’s also possible that you will see or imagine an image. Much to your surprise it’s of you and you’re dumping a can of orange paint on the head of the meditation teacher! The idea is so absurd that a bubbly laughter arises from deep inside. Then, quite remarkably, your whole body relaxes and you know you have moved through your anger. “Just think,” you say to yourself, “I almost cut the sit short!”
After the exhilaration of the moment dies down, it might be that both your anger and your physical pain return. That’s when you realize there’s a lot more to learn.
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Sitting Part I
What does it mean to “sit” in meditation? Primarily it means to have a sitting practice. Developing one includes establishing a regular time, a special place, and a quiet surround. For some of us those conditions are hard to come by, and we have to make do with less. Even under the best of circumstances establishing a practice can be a challenge. It is much like training to become a long distance runner; when the body becomes habituated, not only is the routine easy, sitting down on the cushion is like coming home.
Here are some suggestions: Make it your intention to meditate daily, and try not to blame yourself when you miss a day, a week, or even several months. Self-blame will make it less likely that you will return. Figure out what time of day is best for your particular body, and then keep to it until the body itself expects to meditate at that moment. I found the key to establishing a practice when I learned to move from my early morning bed, with a quick stop in the bathroom, directly to the cushion
You also need to choose an object to meditate on. Since meditation is a means of exploring who you are and how you perceive the world, it makes sense to focus on your mind/body process. To do this choose one of your six senses; hearing, seeing, tasting, smelling, feelings in the body, or thoughts in the mind—after all it’s through your senses that you know yourself and the world.
If you make hearing the object of your meditation, place your attention at your two ears, close your eyes, and listen with awareness. More informally, I enjoy meditating on sound in crowded restaurants. What is initially loud noise can become a symphony. I recall a time in one restaurant when I heard a conversation to my left arise and subside while laughter on my right pierced the flow. In front came the rattle of dishes as a waitress cleared a table, and behind it all was the happy hum of people enjoying themselves.
Here are some suggestions: Make it your intention to meditate daily, and try not to blame yourself when you miss a day, a week, or even several months. Self-blame will make it less likely that you will return. Figure out what time of day is best for your particular body, and then keep to it until the body itself expects to meditate at that moment. I found the key to establishing a practice when I learned to move from my early morning bed, with a quick stop in the bathroom, directly to the cushion
You also need to choose an object to meditate on. Since meditation is a means of exploring who you are and how you perceive the world, it makes sense to focus on your mind/body process. To do this choose one of your six senses; hearing, seeing, tasting, smelling, feelings in the body, or thoughts in the mind—after all it’s through your senses that you know yourself and the world.
If you make hearing the object of your meditation, place your attention at your two ears, close your eyes, and listen with awareness. More informally, I enjoy meditating on sound in crowded restaurants. What is initially loud noise can become a symphony. I recall a time in one restaurant when I heard a conversation to my left arise and subside while laughter on my right pierced the flow. In front came the rattle of dishes as a waitress cleared a table, and behind it all was the happy hum of people enjoying themselves.
Impermanence...Part III
How does awareness of our ever-changing emotions affect daily life? A woman I know who is a meditator, and the mother of a ten-year-old boy, sheds some light on the question.
"Sometime late in the afternoon my son, Danny, got antsy and began to run around the living room. Fairly soon I heard my daughter cry. Danny had tripped her. After a mild rebuke, I tried to divert his attention by suggesting that he play a game on his Xbox. You would have thought I told him to eat worms! He stomped and screamed at me, and before I knew it, I was screaming back at him. In my effort to calm him down, I became as out-of-control as he was.
"If only I had remembered to watch my emotions rise, manifest and fade instead of grabbing on and riding them like a bucking bronco. I got thrown and trampled in the process!!!! How I wish I had watched that bucking bronco instead of hopping on!
"This Mom responded to her son's fleeting mood as if it were a mighty force that had to be conquered. In so doing she pumped lots of energy into that late afternoon fiasco. The good news is that she was aware of it and so not completely lost. I wonder what would have happened if she had, as she wished, stepped aside and simply observed her own upset.
What happens for you?
"Sometime late in the afternoon my son, Danny, got antsy and began to run around the living room. Fairly soon I heard my daughter cry. Danny had tripped her. After a mild rebuke, I tried to divert his attention by suggesting that he play a game on his Xbox. You would have thought I told him to eat worms! He stomped and screamed at me, and before I knew it, I was screaming back at him. In my effort to calm him down, I became as out-of-control as he was.
"If only I had remembered to watch my emotions rise, manifest and fade instead of grabbing on and riding them like a bucking bronco. I got thrown and trampled in the process!!!! How I wish I had watched that bucking bronco instead of hopping on!
"This Mom responded to her son's fleeting mood as if it were a mighty force that had to be conquered. In so doing she pumped lots of energy into that late afternoon fiasco. The good news is that she was aware of it and so not completely lost. I wonder what would have happened if she had, as she wished, stepped aside and simply observed her own upset.
What happens for you?
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Sitting Part I
What does it mean to “sit” in meditation? Primarily it means to have a sitting practice. Developing one includes establishing a regular time, a special place, and a quiet surround. For some of us those conditions are hard to come by, and we have to make do with less. Even under the best of circumstances establishing a practice can be a challenge. It is much like training to become a long distance runner; when the body becomes habituated, not only is the routine easy, sitting down on the cushion is like coming home.
Here are some suggestions: Make it your intention to meditate daily, and try not to blame yourself when you miss a day, a week, or even several months. Self-blame will make it less likely that you will return. Figure out what time of day is best for your particular body, and then keep to it until the body itself expects to meditate at that moment. I found the key to establishing a practice when I learned to move from my early morning bed, with a quick stop in the bathroom, directly to the cushion
You also need to choose an object to meditate on. Since meditation is a means of exploring who you are and how you perceive the world, it makes sense to focus on your mind/body process. To do this choose one of your six senses; hearing, seeing, tasting, smelling, feelings in the body, or thoughts in the mind—after all it’s through your senses that you know yourself and the world. .
If you make hearing the object of your meditation, place your attention at your two ears, close your eyes, and listen with awareness. More informally, I enjoy meditating on sound in crowded restaurants. What is initially loud noise can become a symphony. I recall a time in one restaurant when I heard a conversation to my left arise and subside while laughter on my right pierced the flow. In front came the rattle of dishes as a waitress cleared a table, and behind it all was the happy hum of people enjoying themselves.
Here are some suggestions: Make it your intention to meditate daily, and try not to blame yourself when you miss a day, a week, or even several months. Self-blame will make it less likely that you will return. Figure out what time of day is best for your particular body, and then keep to it until the body itself expects to meditate at that moment. I found the key to establishing a practice when I learned to move from my early morning bed, with a quick stop in the bathroom, directly to the cushion
You also need to choose an object to meditate on. Since meditation is a means of exploring who you are and how you perceive the world, it makes sense to focus on your mind/body process. To do this choose one of your six senses; hearing, seeing, tasting, smelling, feelings in the body, or thoughts in the mind—after all it’s through your senses that you know yourself and the world. .
If you make hearing the object of your meditation, place your attention at your two ears, close your eyes, and listen with awareness. More informally, I enjoy meditating on sound in crowded restaurants. What is initially loud noise can become a symphony. I recall a time in one restaurant when I heard a conversation to my left arise and subside while laughter on my right pierced the flow. In front came the rattle of dishes as a waitress cleared a table, and behind it all was the happy hum of people enjoying themselves.
Thursday, April 12, 2007
Impermanence...Part III
How does awareness of our ever-changing emotions affect daily life? A woman I know who is a meditator, and the mother of a ten-year-old boy, sheds some light on the question.
"Sometime late in the afternoon my son, Danny, got antsy and began to run around the living room. Fairly soon I heard my daughter cry. Danny had tripped her. After a mild rebuke, I tried to divert his attention by suggesting that he play a game on his Xbox. You would have thought I told him to eat worms! He stomped and screamed at me, and before I knew it, I was screaming back at him. In my effort to calm him down, I became as out-of-control as he was.
"If only I had remembered to watch my emotions rise, manifest and fade instead of grabbing on and riding them like a bucking bronco. I got thrown and trampled in the process!!!! How I wish I had watched that bucking bronco instead of hopping on!"
This Mom responded to her son's fleeting mood as if it were a mighty force that had to be conquered. In so doing she pumped lots of energy into that late afternoon fiasco. The good news is that she was aware of it and so not completely lost. I wonder what would have happened if she had, as she wished, stepped aside and simply observed her own upset.
What happens for you?
"Sometime late in the afternoon my son, Danny, got antsy and began to run around the living room. Fairly soon I heard my daughter cry. Danny had tripped her. After a mild rebuke, I tried to divert his attention by suggesting that he play a game on his Xbox. You would have thought I told him to eat worms! He stomped and screamed at me, and before I knew it, I was screaming back at him. In my effort to calm him down, I became as out-of-control as he was.
"If only I had remembered to watch my emotions rise, manifest and fade instead of grabbing on and riding them like a bucking bronco. I got thrown and trampled in the process!!!! How I wish I had watched that bucking bronco instead of hopping on!"
This Mom responded to her son's fleeting mood as if it were a mighty force that had to be conquered. In so doing she pumped lots of energy into that late afternoon fiasco. The good news is that she was aware of it and so not completely lost. I wonder what would have happened if she had, as she wished, stepped aside and simply observed her own upset.
What happens for you?
Friday, March 23, 2007
Impermanence...Part II
While we know intellectually that our world is impermanent, our mental software leads us to believe in permanence. We see the stars above us as ever lasting even though we know that each one is burning up. We behave toward the earth as though it is permanent even though evidence is mounting that it is fragile.
How can we give up the illusion of permanence and more fully experience life as ever changing? Clearly we can use our minds to be in touch with change, noting perhaps, changing weather patterns or the growing height of our children. The trouble is that intellectual knowing does only a little to change our mental software.
Meditative skills do more. They teach us how to relax into life, and that, in itself, starts to reshape our minds. When a pain arises, we loosen our muscles rather than tighten them. When anger emerges we allow plenty of room for it to manifest, fade, and perhaps emerge again. When troublesome thoughts plague we stay aware and let them to do their dance.
Cherishing the moment we actually hear the sound of falling rain or see the beauty of a sunset. Along the way we might also gain insight into a poignant truth about our world – if it weren’t for impermanence neither you nor I would be here now.
How can we give up the illusion of permanence and more fully experience life as ever changing? Clearly we can use our minds to be in touch with change, noting perhaps, changing weather patterns or the growing height of our children. The trouble is that intellectual knowing does only a little to change our mental software.
Meditative skills do more. They teach us how to relax into life, and that, in itself, starts to reshape our minds. When a pain arises, we loosen our muscles rather than tighten them. When anger emerges we allow plenty of room for it to manifest, fade, and perhaps emerge again. When troublesome thoughts plague we stay aware and let them to do their dance.
Cherishing the moment we actually hear the sound of falling rain or see the beauty of a sunset. Along the way we might also gain insight into a poignant truth about our world – if it weren’t for impermanence neither you nor I would be here now.
Tuesday, March 6, 2007
Impermanence...Part I
We are mostly unaware of the reality of change in our everyday lives. There are times, for instance, when we catch a glimpse of ourselves in the mirror and wonder, with surprise and even shock, what happened to the youngsters we once were. Where did the time go? While we know intellectually that change is constant, our mental software leads us to believe in permanence.
During meditation this software is redesigned. We become aware that everything that exists is ever changing including our emotions. A feeling of peace can quickly be followed by fear or any one of a number of emotions. And sadness can be followed by love. There is no permanence here. Such body-based awareness means that we are less likely, in our everyday lives, to get stuck in one or another feeling.
When we meditate on the flow of thought we notice that there are moments of rest. The flow isn't permanent. Meditating on physical sensations, be it the rhythm of the breath or the beating of the heart, once again we are aware of restful moments. Even pain doesn't last forever; studying it, we realize that it arises, manifests, and fades.
Not that insight into impermanence offers an easy ride. It teaches that change is both constant and unpredictable, which means that whether you are kind or ruthless sometimes life goes well and sometimes it goes badly.
During meditation this software is redesigned. We become aware that everything that exists is ever changing including our emotions. A feeling of peace can quickly be followed by fear or any one of a number of emotions. And sadness can be followed by love. There is no permanence here. Such body-based awareness means that we are less likely, in our everyday lives, to get stuck in one or another feeling.
When we meditate on the flow of thought we notice that there are moments of rest. The flow isn't permanent. Meditating on physical sensations, be it the rhythm of the breath or the beating of the heart, once again we are aware of restful moments. Even pain doesn't last forever; studying it, we realize that it arises, manifests, and fades.
Not that insight into impermanence offers an easy ride. It teaches that change is both constant and unpredictable, which means that whether you are kind or ruthless sometimes life goes well and sometimes it goes badly.
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